Dear people of the world,
Today I was brave. Today I handed over my youngest child to someone else. It’s the beginning of a new era. I woke up to a stomach full of nerves – it hurt. My husband and I said goodbye, it was heartbreaking. Within 5 minutes of leaving a very upset looking little boy (who didn’t cry, but the look on his face said it all) our awesome carer had sent us photos of a very settled happy child. My nerves eased slightly. I went and got a workout in, one of the trainers gasped seeing me during the daylight hours, we laughed together, I sweat out some more nerves. I drove home and at the stop sign just 1 block away from my house something happened. A peace kicked in and I overheard myself let out a huge sigh. A sigh that had been building up for 11 years. I am happy. My son now gets to interact with new people and experience new activities. He will be doing things that I can’t offer him on my own and I can now have some space to breathe. My house will be able to stay clean for more than 5 minutes. I can start creating more again. I experienced a state of euphoria at that stop sign, I became aware of just how much this time out represented. I was never anxious about my other 3 children heading off, just pure excitement was the feeling for them but there is something about sending your youngest child out into the world without you that can cause a Mother to grieve for a moment. But world, that’s it. I’m done. 11 years well served. I am excited to see what the future holds for us all. I am proud of my son for being just as brave as his Mum today. We are attached at the hip, I think we did well. I just wanted to share. Parenthood is amazing .:)
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